When I became a parent I didn’t realise how incredibly frustrating dealing with toddler defiance would be. Lucky for us (?!) we have a bright and strong willed daughter….. who is prone to the odd pretty constant occasions of defiance.
So here is an open letter to my daughter.
Dear Defiant Daughter,
Now, light of my life, I love you very much, but I just wanted you to note the following things. PLEASE pay attention to them,
- ‘No’ is not an appropriate answer to EVERY question Mummy or Daddy asks you. Sometimes you have to use your other words.
- You are not part mountain goat and the world won’t end if you don’t climb on EVERYTHING.
- Following on from point 2 Mummy and Daddy aren’t being awful in asking you to get down, we are trying to avoid the tantrums when we have to forcibly remove you. Also, remember when I carried you to the Doctors and Daddy then took you to the emergency dentist, yeah that; we don’t want that again, do we?!
- If you don’t want the food we make you, here’s a tip, just leave it on your plate. It doesn’t have to become small projectile missiles.
- Following on from point 4, your plate/bowl doesn’t always have to be worn as a hat… you have lots of actual hats that, ironically, you won’t wear…
- News Flash! No one likes poo and to be honest Mummy and Daddy don’t really enjoy changing your nappy; I would rather be sipping a glass of pinot. However, trying to stand up, throwing the changing mat across the room or trying to wipe said poo off using the wall, doesn’t help our speed and effectiveness when trying to deal with the task in hand.
- If we wanted furniture moving around the living room constantly, we would call Pickfords! You, my sweet, do not have to do it. Do you think the feng shui is wrong..?
- PLEASE believe me your car seat harness is there for your safety. Stop contorting your little body and escaping!
- You are 22 months old, you do not NEED my mobile phone. Although, I do have a strange pride that you can take a selfie…
- You are not Fagin, stop nicking my stuff.
- Please can you just leave your socks ON!
Lots of love from your loving and extremely patient Mummy,
xxx
Comments 118
Did you set up cameras in my house? My 2 year old daughter is like yours in so many ways!
Author
Ha ha! Oh she’s ‘strong willed’ too then! 😉 x
I think if people told you just how defiant and tiring Toddlers are then the birth rate would drop dramatically 😉
They do grow out of it, but then they turn into threenagers and then when school starts tantrums return due to tiredness. At least the longer this stage goes on, the better prepared you are for the next one xxx
Author
Exhausting! 🙂 xxx
Absolutely love this. Genius post. Part mountain goat, she must be related to my two! Ha ha loving our little appearance in the background. And hey, she looks super cool with that mobile!!! Xxxx
Author
Ah thank you huni. I am so glad you liked it! Oh yes your little photo bomber 🙂 xxx
THe Fagin comment cracked me up. Toddlers are brilliant eh 🙂 ha ha xxx
Author
Thanks huni. Honestly if we weren’t law abiding I would be focusing on this pick pocketing skill of hers and honing it xxx
Bahahaha oh goodness Aby, I almost spat my tea out at ‘you are not part mountain goat’ that post was a hilarious read, absolutely love it. All so true as well, I’m giggling away here.. I love the first shot of her in her tutu as I can just imagine her little face while she’s lying on the floor! Brilliant post 🙂 xxx
Author
Thanks so much huni. I am really glad you liked it xxx
lol…. made me smile! though I like a child who isn’t afraid to say no
Author
Oh she definitely isn’t afraid of that huni x
LOVE LOVE LOVE!!!!
Especially the part mountain goat comment!!! HILARIOUS!!! Now if only they would listen hey!!!
X
Author
Thanks huni! OMG now she might be bright but her listening skills are rubbish! x
This is hilarious!!! I have no kids yet but now know what to watch out for…!!
Author
Thanks huni! Glad you liked it x
Ah I love this! Aidan’s already doing half of these things – will be in trouble when he’s ”terrible two” x
Author
Thanks huni. Uh Oh, yes we haven’t hit 2 yet! x
Tee hee this is hilarious Aby, but I can imagine super frustrating at times. As you said though it’s great that baby is such a bright little button. A toddlers world is so full of frustration at this age – hence all the shouting and throwing. It’s their Only form of communication xx
Author
She is also a joy, but wow what an attitude! 🙂 xx
Haha I love this! Abby is like a stroppy teen and the second we tell her no, she sulks and stomps her feet! Not looking to the actual teen years!
Author
Thanks huni. No me neither! x
We used to call Maxi a curly haired terrorist at that age! They don’t call it the terrible twos for no reason.
Author
No I very much appreciate the term at the moment 😉 x
Haha I can see you looking back on this post in years to come and wishing this is what she was still doing.
Author
Yes I am sure you are right x
lol this so made me giggle .. she is a blooming star is baby 🙂
Author
Glad you liked it huni. She is a bit of a star isn’t she?! 🙂 x
and it never changes lol, honestly when they are 10 like my eldest daughte ris now you will look back and go , awwww why cant you be a little babdy like you were then lol x
Author
Yes you are probably right, I look back on the baby days and think how relaxing is was to have coffee with friends while the babies lay on play mats, Oh those were the days 🙂 x
Ha ha – so funny and so familiar! She sounds like a great, strong character! 🙂
Author
Yeah everyone keeps saying that to me, she is bright and strong willed! Could she be a bit weaker willed just for an hour or two! 😉 x
That’s so sweet! Don’t think they grow out of it either as my teenager still has some of these tendencies! x
Author
Oh no huni! x
Errr good luck there..wait until she is a teenager! 😉
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No! Please let me it stops 🙂 x
Ha! Oh I know the feeling well. Elsa is a pain in the bum at times. She isn’t one for climbing but she has suddenly decided she likes to run off whenever possible, usually when I’m trying to get her dressed or juggle the shopping. She also NEEDS my iphone at all times or a tantrum breaks out!
Author
Sounds like she is as dramatic as Baby! Oh joy! 🙂 x
This is all good training for when she is a threenager and then the even worse tween. Then you have the actual teens. It never ends (and they never leave their socks on)!!! x
Author
Oh no more please! x
Loving the mountain goat bit utterly hilarious and yes toddlers are better at using technology than adults
Author
Thanks huni, I swear she is at least 50/50 x
I love this Aby! Baby certainly knows her own mind doesn’t she?! She’s amazing though and a credit to you and Hubby xxx
Author
Thanks huni! She does know her own mind, for sure! Ah bless you thanks lovely xxx
Brilliant Post!! I can remember my son giving just as much fun as you are having. Lol Made me laugh
Author
Thanks lovely, glad you enjoyed it x
Ha ha ha! Funny because it’s true! Wonderboy would give Fagan a run for his money too – I found dice and a girl’s clasp in his trouser pocket after preschool last week :/
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Baby has started stuffing things down her vest! Give me strength! x
Ha ha this is my boy to a t! xxx
Author
They are ‘challenging too’? xx
I hope you show this to her when she is older!
Author
Oh I will don’t you worry about that! 🙂 x
Haha, so cute and funny! They do like to test us don’t they?! xx #MMWBH
Author
Oh yes they do! xx
Oh I could’ve written this post! Seriously…mine is 26 months now but she is as stubborn as they come :_
Author
Give us both strength 🙂 x
I always used to be so smug when people told me these toddler stories as our son was an angel. Now I have a daughter I totally sympathise, she is gorgeous but such a handful! Good luck!
Author
We have a gorgeous handful too! x
Haa haa – Sebby is much the same and I quite like that they can take their own selfies
Author
At least we have taught them one thing! x
Sorry but I’m proper laughing at this Aby and I feel your pain
Author
I am glad you liked it huni! x
This made me chuckle. My 2 year old does most of these. luckily it’s not gone as far as a dentist or doctors yet!
Linking from Super busy mum.
Author
I hope he never does! x
Hehe, hilarious!!
Boo loves to steal things (especially phones) too
They do like to keep us on our toes don’t they!!
Author
Oh yes they do! 🙂
Haha…. it is comforting to know that we all experience similar problems! Sometimes it feels like all we do is stop them doing thing and saying no. It can be incredibly frustrating. Worse still though is the tantrums for no reason at all. I think it’s because they are at an age where they can communicate and be independent but can’t do either as effectively as they really want.
Love this! Especially the part about Fagin – which applies both to my toddler and my teen!
Author
Glad you enjoyed it! I always want to burst into song, when she nicks my phone x
Author
Glad you enjoyed it x
I love this post because I can so see my 2 year old son in this…. especially the mountain goat point! Thank God this phase only lasts for another few months! Enjoy it…. they grow so quickly! x
Author
Oh I hope it doesn’t last long! x
lol… I recall having this same conversation a few times with each child… I still repeat myself as I say – It is not your god given right to have a play date after school… Yes you need to brush your teeth everyday – in fact twice a day…. Please put on jocks under your school uniform…. If you are hungry have a piece of fruit – NO – well your not hungry then…..
Author
Exhausting isn’t it! x
Lol, this is brilliant! So funny and so very true. There are so many things in this list that I identify with and your comment about not being part mountain goat made me chuckle – that definitely sums up Sophie at the moment! Good luck with trying to convince Baby of these things! 🙂
Author
Thanks huni, glad you liked it x
I properly snorted at part mountain goat!! This is just so funny!!!
Author
Thanks huni. Glad you liked it x
This post made me chuckle! Especially the “part mountain goat” one. hahaha That was my son too. He started walking at 10 months and before he was a year old he climbed everything!! He’s almost 3 and he still loves to climb! #TheList
Author
Glad you enjoyed it huni x
Brilliant! Sounds just like my toddler. Little darlings aren’t they?! #mmwbh
Author
It is a good job she is cute I can tell you! x
As a mum of 2 very defiant daughters who did all of the above, but are now 3 and 5, I’d like to say it gets better… It doesn’t. The list just gets longer! x
Author
Oh no, that is not what I wanted to hear! x
Very similar to the Houdini I gave birth to lol! ~ #TheList
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Fun isn’t it?! 😉 x
Ahh this made me laugh, we have a little defiant daughter too, i like to say shes just a firey little irish red head 😉 so many of your musings relate to us too, glad im not alone
Author
Oh no you are definitely NOT alone. Glad you liked it huni x
Love this post Aby. Oh my god socks! What is it with kids and socks? and hats? and gloves? maybe just clothing in general! #thelist
Author
Thanks, so glad you liked it. Clothes are child repellent! x
Haha, oh man do I have a lot in store for me when my baby becomes a toddler. Thanks for the laugh, kind of 🙂
Author
Yes you have all this fun to come 🙂 x
Oh yes, I remember this all so well and got it all to come again! My first was much more defiant than my second so Ava could go either way x
Author
Fun times 🙂 x
Ha, I have two very stubborn children too, and I’m sure baby is heading that way too. I keep thinking it will be good when they are teenagers and won’t be peer pressured because they know their own mind! x #thelist
Author
I am sure you are right, it is just hardcore at the moment! 🙂 x
Oh that did make me laugh, could apply to both of mine! Oh and just you wait til she’s a teenager, if you think she gives you a run for your money now you ain’t seen nothing yet as they say (mine recently turned 13 – sod the wine just send vodka!) x
Author
I can’t wait….. x
This made me smile a lot as although, my son is not a girl (obviously), he is 20 months old and sounds very similar to your daughter. He especially likes seeing how far he can throw his dinner across the room.
Author
Yes that is one of her favourite activities too! x
I can totally relate to this – so true! x
Author
Monkey’s aren’t they?! x
Ha what a little character she is x
Author
She is a monkey! 🙂 x
I could have written this post myself! How do people with twins both going through the terrible two’s cope?! I know it’s formative and normal and have a collaborative post in drafts on tips to deal with it all but it’s so hard isn’t it. Helps they’re cute at least huh (a bit)! Thanks for linking up to #brilliantblogposts! x
Author
Oh it is a very good job she is cute! I have no idea at all how twin mums manage x
This is so funny and I loved reading the post. Your little one sounds like she has a very strong personality and is very confidant.
Author
Glad you enjoyed it. She sure has! x
Ha ha I love this Aby, Joe too thinks he is half mountain goat and he is 9, so i fear she may not grow out of this xx
Author
Thank you huni, glad you enjoyed it. Oh no, that is NOT what I wanted to hear 🙂 x
So funny and far too many of these points are familiar. Food missiles is one of the Tot’s favourite games. They’re usually aimed at my head! 🙂 x
Author
They are little darlings, aren’t they! x
Sounds like it’s laugh-a-minute in your house…. had a few of these ‘moments’ myself!
Author
Yeah it’s fun and games here! 🙂 x
this sounds so familiar it’s scary, 21 month old in our house and your “dear defiant daughter” blog sounds like your describing her! 😀
Oh Sam is exactly the same! Post made me giggle. Great post as always.
LOL … love it! I think every parent will relate to the points you raised and your daughter will obviously read this letter in years to come and have such a laugh; she probably will ask if she actually did some of the things you noted.
A really lovely, heart warming post; thanks for sharing. #TheList 23
Author
She is a little monkey! x