Do you ever feel disheartened about your blog? Spend time drooling over other people’s blogs, so much so that you begin to doubt your own ability? Do you spend a lot of time focused on what other people are doing? Sound familiar? Here are my tips of how to overcome jealousy in blogging.
Comparison is the thief of joy
If you have chinks in your self-belief and self-confidence, seeing another blogger killing it can lead to jealousy and even more self-doubt. Within you, you have the power to spend time focusing on other people or to give all of your energy to improving yourself and your own situation. You could be comparing yourself to a certain blogger, with no knowledge that that person has a whole team of people helping them to achieve the things they achieve. Or you might compare your photos to someone else’s, without the knowledge that the specific blogger used to work as a photographer.
Don’t compare your start to someone else’s middle
So you see you can’t compare your story to someone else’s.
How to stop focusing on others and overcome jealousy
Honesty
First off, it’s time to be honest with yourself. What’s the thing that makes you feel insecure? Do you feel you lack skill in a certain area? Spend time trying to get to the bottom of what it is that causes you to doubt yourself.
You are your own competition
Whatever you do, there are always people who are going to be doing it better than you. You need to shift your focus from being concerned with other people, to focusing on yourself. You can’t control what other people do, but you can control what you do. Set yourself achieveable goals and focus on these.
There’s only one you
You are unique and therefore so is your blog. If you show your personality through your blog, there will be no other blog like it. Relish this and know your worth. Become the best you and in turn make your blog the best blog it can be.
You are wasting time
Focusing on other people and what they are doing takes up time, that you really don’t have to waste. Believe me there is so much that you could be doing to improve your own little piece of the internet, obsessing over others is not productive. Less time worrying about other bloggers, will result in more time being available to put into your readers, your clients and yourself.
Develop a strategy
Ok, so I have spent lots of time so far telling you not to focus on other bloggers; however, knowing what other bloggers are doing can be important for market research purposes.
There is a major BUT coming, don’t be disheartened by seeing their updates in your news feed. You can always unfollow people and choose a time to check out your peers and learn from what they are doing. Are they doing something that could spark an idea in you for your blog?
There’s room for everyone
There’s an infinite amount of space for bloggers. So as long as you are being authentic and working hard to give your readers the best blog you can, another blogger cannot ‘steal’ your readers or your business.
Competition isn’t always bad
You know what competition is actually a good thing. Competition can push you to be more creative and to try something new. Connecting with other bloggers is actually a fabulous way to form amazing online communities which can benefit all involved.
Having friendships with people doing the same thing as you day in day out can be so powerful and can help all involved to raise their game and improve their individual blogs.
Next time the green eyed monster pays you a visit or when you feel unworthy, remember you cannot judge someone else’s situation as you don’t know what is going on behind the scenes. Turn these negative feelings into something positive and work to improve the aspects of your own situation that will help you to feel more confident.
Do you compare yourself to other bloggers? Do you see other bloggers as your competition?
Like it? Then pin it!
Comments 18
Thank you for the good advice. It is sometimes difficult as a new blogger not to feel a bit insecure when I see really established, fantastic blogs. I try to remind myself that everyone had to start somewhere and turn feelings of insecurity around to being inspired by the simply amazing work that some people are doing!
Such a great post Aby with really great advice. We are all only human and it is ok to feel jealous and self doubt from time to time. I know I am plagued with insecurities from time to time. But you give great advice on working through it. I love your new blog design too, as I said on twitter! xx
This! All of this. I have my little mantra, I must not compare myself to strangers on the Internet – or friends for that matter. It’s so easy to start being critical that so and so is doing xyz when it’s like comparing apples and oranges: are they years further on, are they doing it full time etc You can only be yourself – be inspired by others and a creative push is great but make it positive. Besides who knows who’s looking at your blog feeling jealous too 🙂
I spotted this in my Twitter feed earlier in the week and open it to read later, now linked on the list I now can!! You are completely right that the jealousy can seep in and these are great tips on how to deal with it. Definitely having supportive friends is a positive thing, I admire so many bloggers and I just plod on regardless and hope for the best!!
This is such a great post. I am a big believer in never comparing yourself to anyone else. What is the point? We are all individuals and therefore all different. We should be looking at ourselves and asking why we feel the need to compare because like you say it only leads to insecurities. Instead of comparing we should be celebrating other blogs. No one likes a party pooper 🙂 #Thelist
When I was a brand new blogger I used to look at beautiful established blogs and just be in awe. I can’t say I was jealous but these amazing blogs gave me something to strive for, they inspired me. I did go through a phase of comparing my following to others, this just made me really miserable so I stopped! Now I just do what I want and whatever makes me happy. I am all about supporting other bloggers, I never see blogging as competition..there’s enough Internet for us all to share 🙂 xx #TheList
This is such a great post, with so much good advice. I think it’s inevitable that we all feel like this at times as bloggers, but it’s so important to recognise our own strengths, and to look to channel those negative thoughts into something more positive. I’ve always loved the quote about us all being on a journey and not comparing our beginning to someone else’s middle – it’s spot on! #TheList
Some important (and also very mindful!) points here especially when you mention being ‘authentic’ and the fact that comparing oneself to others isn’t particularly helpful when we don’t know their ‘story’. One important principle of Mindfulness is ‘thoughts are not facts’ and I think this links really well to what you’re saying here. I love your blogging advice – always spot on and helpful. Thanks for hosting #thelist x
This is perfect lovely – I can’t agree more on the only important competition being yourself – in blogging at least. I just try and keep improving on what I’VE done before, rather than others. And there is 100% enough room for everyone and a million more bloggers 🙂 x x #TheList
This is a great post. I’m only a few weeks in with my blog and it is hard not to compare myself with others and worry if I’ll ever be that good. At the same time though, I know I am only at the beginning of my journey and I am trying to learn as much as I can form all the amazing blogs I am discovering (like yours) and use them as a source of inspiration.
#TheList
I get so insecure about my blog, to the point a couple of weeks ago I nearly just gave it all up. I am so glad I didn’t though and instead I have spent the last few weeks refocusing and really enjoying it. Trying not to compare yourself to others is hard isn’t it, fab tips for working through it 🙂 #TheList x
This is a great reminder to focus on the positivity and community that blogging brings. I’ve been downhearted at times when similar bloggers who started later than me hurtle past in terms of audience and brand collaboration. But there’s a lot more to it than that and there isn’t any point comparing yourself to others who may well be working full time or with a specialist background. Doing our own thing and being ourselves, while embracing other bloggers as friends rather than competitors is definitely the way to go. #thelist
I think most blogger’s struggle with self doubt at times. But i agree totally that we should be setting our own goals and focusing on improving to make our blogs the best we can four readers. I love the writing but struggle with Promotion. I think we all know ou strengths and weaknesses. Other bloggers can be a wonderful source of support! #thelist
This is a great post Aby because every blogger must feel like this at some point. It’s easy to get bored with our own blogs or disheartened that we’re not getting the opportunities others get. I think it’s great to support each other though. That’s why it’s so nice that bloggers like you share your expertise and knowledge to help other bloggers. We are definitely stronger as a team! xx
Such wonderful advice. I just have to tell you, your blog has been so helpful. You share such great advice for those like me new to blogging. So a big thank you to you and your blog. You are fantastic!
Author
Ah that is lovely to hear, I am so glad it is helpful. I have just set up a courses page as am soon launching my blogging courses, so have a look if you think you are interested – https://www.youbabymemummy.com/blogging-courses xx
I will check it out. Thank you!
Very good advice. I think few people are actually immune to the jealousy and comparing with others, but you do have to try to put it aside & not let it consume you, as it is ultimately a complete waste of time. #thelist